You Might Be A Redneck If The

You May Be A Redneck If . . . You Think You Are An Entrepreneur Because Of The "dirt For Sale" Sign In The Front Yard.

I Don't Know Why My Brain Has Kept All The Words To The Gilligan's Island Theme Song And Has Deleted Everything About Triangles.

Any Job That Posts A Price List For Your Body Parts Is A Bad Job.

You Know You're A Redneck If Your Home Has Wheels And Your Car Doesn't.

Whatever Cleaning Goes On On The Planet, Women Do 99% Of It. But See, Women Are Not As Proud Of Their 99% As Men Are Of Our One! We Clean Something Up, We're Gonna Talk About It All Year Long. It Might Be On The News, You Don't Know. A Woman Could Be Out Re-paving The Driveway. Men Actually Have Enough Gall To Run Out On The Porch And Go "hey Baby? Man, It's Hot As Hell Out Here, Ain't It! Look, Don't Worry About Emptyin' That Ashtray In The Den, I Done Got It, All Right? Did It For You, Sweet Pea. I'm Gonna Go Take A Nap Now, All Right?"