You Learn Who Your Friends Are When

It [retirement] Was Absolutely Boring. You Can't Go And Say, 'i'm Retired Now. That's It!' It Won't Take Long And You're Really Gone For Good And Someone Throws The Last Shovel Of Dirt On A Coffin With Your Name On It. That's The Moment You're Really Retiring - When You Die.

Thank God For The Bomb. Nuke Ya, Nuke Ya.

Sex Isn't The Priority Anymore, Now I'm 65. But It Still Goes On. I Want It And She Doesn't, Same As Ever.

If You Can Laugh At Your Mistakes, It's A Good Thing.

I Grew Up Having To Piss In A Bucket ’cos There Was No Indoor Shitter, And Now I Have These Computerised Japanese Super-loo Things That Have Heated Seats And Wash And Blow-dry Your Arse At The Touch Of A Button. Give It A Couple Of Years And I’ll Have A Bog With A Robot Arm That Pulls Out My Turds, So I Don’t Have To Strain.