You Know What You Call The Two

Arnold Schwarzenegger Announced That He Is Going To Run For Governor On Our Program Last Night. My Staff Didn't Know, Arnold's Staff Didn't Know, I Was Shocked As Everyone Else. If He Doesn't Get Elected Governor, Maybe He Should Work For The Cia. I Mean, He Can Keep A Secret Better Than They Can.

I'm Trying To Sum Up President Obama's First 11 Months In Office. He Gave Billions To Wall Street, Cracked Down On Illegal Immigrants Getting Health Care, And He's Sending 30,000 More Troops To Afghanistan. You Know Something, He May Go Down In History As Our Greatest Republican President Ever.

In Afghanistan, U.s. Troops Are Now Holding An American Man Who Has Been Fighting Alongside The Taliban. His Mother Says He Was Born In Washington, D.c. And His Father's A Lawyer. Well, That Explains It. ... He Surrendered To Authorities And Said He Wants To Go Back To His Old Job - Airline Security Guard.

In An Unlikely Pairing, Hillary Clinton Made An Appearance This Week With Newt Gingrich To Push A Health Care Plan. The Press Is Making A Big Deal Out This Thing With Newt But, Hey, If Anyone Knows How To Appear In Public With A Man She Can't Stand, It's Hillary.

The Houston Astros Want To Change The Name Of Enron Field Where They Play. I Guess The Enron Name Could Cause Problems For Them. Like Players Could Steal A Base And Then Deny It.