You Can Keep A Dog: But It

Television Is Of Great Educational Value. It Teaches You While Still Young How To (a) Kill, (b) Rob, (c) Embezzle, (d) Shoot, (e) Poison, And, Generally Speaking, (f) How To Grow Up Into A Wild West Outlaw Or Gangster By The Time You Leave School.

Was He Joking? Was He Being Sarcastic? Aggressive? Impertinent? Or Just Courteous? There Was No Telling From His Impassive Face. What A Country, He Thought Despairingly. In Russia You Always Knew. If A Man Made A Stern Face He Was Threatening; If He Was Laughing Uproariously, He Was Joking.

In Moscow They Do Not Pay Much Attention To The Living But Keep Their Cemeteries In A Splendid State.

In The Field Of Snobbery, Australia Is An Underdeveloped Country; Even A Few British Ex-colonies, Regarded As Under Developed In All Other Respects, Could Export A Great Deal Of Snobbery To Australia And Still Have Enough To Spare For Their Own, Internal Needs.

Jokes Are Better Than War. Even The Most Aggressive Jokes Are Better Than The Least Aggressive Wars. Even The Longest Jokes Are Better Than The Shortest Wars.