Women Are Cursed, And Men Are The

I Want To Eat, Cook, Meet Famous People And Make Fun Of Them.

I Am An Observant Jew! Now My Secret Is Out.

After My 1985 Appearance On The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson, I Was Wooed By Producers In Hollywood, Who Told Me They Wanted To Turn My Act Into A Sitcom.

I Say I'm The Only Serious Comedian In The Presidential Race. And I'd Like To Take This Opportunity To Ask Both Romney And Obama To Debate Me. Because I Think That Both Of Those Guys - I Think That The American People Are Being Given A False Choice, Because The Choice Between The Lesser Of Two Evils Is A False Choice.

Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Show Business.