When I Was A Kid, I Always

The Reason You Often Get In Comedy Is Because You're Not Getting Laid.

I Don't Know If I'll Ever Be A Master At Anything, But I Think That's A Mistake For Me Personally. I Don't Know How Much It's About The Journey, But It's More About The Process.

Sometimes It Looks Like I'm Dancing, But It's Just That I Walked Into A Spider Web.

I Think There's A Difference Between Making Comedy And Reporting Comedy. When You're A Joke Teller You Can Easily Fall Into The Second, You Can Show Up And Just Say The Jokes.

I Think Cats Would Have An Even Worse Attitude If They Found Out How Stupid Their Names Were.