Weak Coffee Is The Greatest Sin Against

Yesterday Was The New York City Marathon. Republicans Won In A Landslide.

When You Go To The Mind Reader, Do You Get Half Price?

I Knew That If I Woke Up Hung Over, I Couldn't Do The Best Possible Job On The Show, So I Had To Quit. Also, I'd Consumed A Lot Of Beer For A Lot Of Years, And I Thought, That's Enough. I've Had My Fun And I'm Glad I Quit.

It's Tax Season. When I Woke This Morning And Realized It Was Tax Season, I Said, My God, Didn't We Just Pay Taxes Last Year?

In Hollywood, Oscar Is King.