We Go Out Of Our Way To

My Mother Comes In My Room And Says, "just Look At This Mess! This Is A Pig Sty!" Now, I've Already Been In The Room Five Hours, And She Wants Me To Look At It.

The Problem Is That Your Daughter Has Given Her Heart To A 15-year-old Boy, And A 15-year-old Boy Does Not Yet Qualify As A Human Being.

A Pelican That Is Wet Walks With A Gated Limp, But A Dry Fish Swims Alone.

Fatherhood Is Pretending The Present You Love Most Is Soap-on-a-rope.

My Eleven Year Old Daughter Mopes Around The House All Day Waiting For Her Breasts To Grow.