Warren Buffett's Company Reportedly Owes The Irs

President Bush Announced Tonight That He Believes In Democracy And That Democracy Can Exist In Iraq. They Can Have A Strong Economy, They Can Have A Good Health Care Plan, And They Can Have A Free And Fair Voting. Iraq? We Can't Even Get This In Florida.

The Best Way To Ruin A Comedy Is To Throw A Lot Of Money At It.

President Obama And House Speaker John Boehner Have Agreed To Play A Round Of Golf Together. Imagine The Two Of Them At The End Of That Golf Game? Boehner Will Be Crying Over His Score And Obama Will Be Giving Three Explanations As To Why His Score Is Actually Better Than It Appears.

They Said These North Korean Missiles Had Enough Range To Hit Seattle, But Residents In Seattle Were Not Worried. Today Bill Gates Said Microsoft Has Enough Missiles To Destroy North Korea Ten Times Over.

Alaska Governor Sarah Palin Pardoned A Turkey, Though She Said She Was Amazed To Find Out That, Besides Being A Bird, Turkey Is Also A Country. Did You See That All Over The Internet Today? While Sarah Palin Was Pardoning A Turkey, Right Behind Her Was A Guy Slaughtering Turkeys. But, See, Like Most Internet Stories, A Little Half-true. Turns Out That, After A Couple Of Minutes Listening To Sarah Palin's Voice, The Turkeys Said 'kill Us Now.'