Twitter! Never Have Lives Been Less Lived

Parenting Is The Easiest Job To Get - You Just Have To Screw Up Once And It's Yours.

The Patriots Deflated Balls Are But An Allegory For America's Deflated Balls In Dealings With Putin, The Mullahs In Iran, And Islamic Terrorists.

Growing Up, My Family Wasn't Very Tight. We Were More Like A Tour Group With Secrets.

Liberals Should Not Overplay This Weapons Of Mass Destruction Card, Because You Want Me To Tell You The Truth? Most Of Us Are Not Going To Care If They Don't Find These Weapons Of Mass Destruction. It's Enough For A Lot Of Us To See Those Kids Smiling On That Street Again.

The World Is So Ass-backwards It Almost Makes You Wish You Were Dyslexic.