Today Is The First Day Of The

I Am Stressed Because Once I Am Flattened Out So Thin To Be Able To Slide Under A Doorway, I May Never Be Able To Ever Be Unflattened So I Could Be Regular Sized Again.

I'd Like A Nice Piece Of Salmon That's Not Too Pink Inside And Yet Isn't Too Dry Or Crisp Either.

It Was A Job; The Video Show Was A Job; You Don't Tell The Aristocrats Joke At 8 O'clock At Night On Network Tv, It Would Be Funny Though. But Those Guys Know I Like Dirty Stuff, I Like Clean Stuff Too.

I Don't Censor Myself, But I Don't Want To Force My Sick-skewed Version Of The World, Either.

Apparently My Street Has A Leaf Blower Gang Who Tag Team All Day, So The Sounds Of The Leaf Blower Are Forever Blowing From Dawn To Dusk.