To Avoid Mistakes And Regrets, Always Consult

If You Want To Know How Old A Woman Is . . . Ask Her Sister-in-law.

The Most Agreeable Thing In Life Is Worthy Accomplishment. It Is Not Possible That The Idle Tramp Is As Contented As The Farmers Along The Road Who Own Their Own Farms, And Whose Credit Is Good At The Bank In Town. When The Tramps Get Together At Night, They Abuse The Farmers, But Do Not Get As Much Satisfaction Out Of It As Do The Farmers Who Abuse The Tramps. The Sounder Your Argument, The More Satisfaction You Get Out Of It.

A Man Forgets His Good Luck Next Day, But Remembers His Bad Luck Until Next Year.

A Man Should Be Taller, Older, Heavier, Uglier, And Hoarser Than His Wife.

Most Of Us Are Either Too Think To Enjoy Eating, Or Too Fat To Enjoy Walking.