Things Aren't Right. If A Burglar Breaks

The Rebel Army In Libya Is Just Like 1,000 Guys In Toyota Trucks. The World Is Asking The Question; Can 1000 Anti-government Guys In Pick-up Trucks With Small Arms, Take Over A Country Of Millions? To Which I Say, Ask The Teabaggers.

A Group Of Cuban Americans Denounced The Castro Government As A Fascist Regime That Monitors And Scrutinized Its Citizens' Everyday Existence. And Then They Excused Themselves To Go Watch Big Brother.

Rick Santorum Doesn't Like Sex. He Doesn't Like The Pill. He Really Doesn't Like Condoms. He Said If Men Are Going To Pull Something On To Prevent Procreation, Nothing Works Better That A Sweater Vest.

When I Do Stand-up Around The Country, I Often See People Walk Out. This Is A Show That They've Purposely Gone To, Where My Name Is On The Ticket, And It Cost Them $75 Or Something. So, You Think, Wow, That Means That They Either Didn't Know Very Much About Me When They Bought Their Tickets Or They're That Offended By What I've Said. I've Been Doing This A Long Time. Anybody Who Comes To One Of My Shows Must Sort Of Have An Idea Of Where I'm Coming From.

If Conservatives Don't Want To Be Seen As Bitter People Who Cling To Their Guns And Religion And Anti-immigrant Sentiments, They Should Stop Being Bitter And Clinging To Their Guns, Religion And Anti-immigrant Sentiments.