There's Always A Host Of Voices You're

You Try Various Things When You're Growing Up. I Was An Attache In The Foreign Service For A While And Then I Drove A Bulldozer, But Neither Of Those Panned Out For Me So It Had To Be Stand-up.

When I Was Young, All The Politicians Looked Like Ancient Latin Teachers Or Greengrocers. They Were Mumbly, Stumbly Men With Their Hair Blowing In Their Eyes, Walking Into Trees, Opening The Wrong Door. They Had No Idea How To Present Themselves.

Now I'm Not An Expert At Mathematics, But I Calculated It Would Take At Least Three Of Me To Take On One Third Of One Of Them, Even If They Were Attacking Me With Just Their Arse.

I Have A Very Low Level Of Recognition, Which Is Fine By Me.

I Can't Swim. I Can't Drive, Either. I Was Going To Learn To Drive But Then I Thought, Well, What If I Crash Into A Lake?