There Is A Bit Of Hans Christian

(referring To The Piano's Natural Shape) Isn't It A Shame When Those Big Fat Opera Singers Lean Against The Pianos And Bend Them?

When An Opera Star Sings Her Head Off? She Usually Improves Her Appearance.

One Afternoon, When I Was Four Years Old, My Father Came Home, And He Found Me In The Living Room In Front Of A Roaring Fire, Which Made Him Very Angry. Because We Didn't Have A Fireplace.

When I Was A Little Boy And Played Liebestraum, My Father Used To Hit Me On The Head With A Newspaper Every Time I Slopped The Cadenza . . . I Hate Liebestraum.

Beethoven Wrote In Three Flats A Lot. That's Because He Moved Twice.