The Skinnification Of America's Jeanscape Has Gone

In America, We Know To Ignore Artists If They're Serious In Any Way.

I Live By Syllogisms: God Is Love. Love Is Blind. Stevie Wonder Is Blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder Is God. I Don't Know What I'd Believe In If It Wasn't For That.

Cameras Are Dangerous. With No Waiting Period Or Background Check, Any Whack-job Could Just Stroll Into A Wal-mart And Walk Out With A Semi-automatic. Now, For Years I've Been Pressing For Stricter Regulations On Cameras, Especially Around Our Elected Officials. Too Many Political Lives Have Been Cut Short By Some Crazed Shooter.

As Shakespeare Said, There's Nothin' Cooler Than Droppin' The 'g's Off Of Gerunds!

It's Time For Me To Give Out An Award To Newly Elected Majority Leader John Boehner. Mr. Boehner Was Elected Just A Few Days Ago To Reform House Republicans, Who Are Feeling The Heat From Lobbyist Scandals. Well, Cnn Found Out That He Rents His Two-bedroom Apartment From A Lobbyist Who Had Clients Who Had Interests In Legislation That Boehner Sponsored. And For That, Mr. Boehner, You've Just Won A Pair Of Stephen Colbert's Big Brass Balls.