The Old Saw About Old Dogs And

Children Make Better Readers Than Adults. They Read As Carefully As I Write; Adults Read As A Means Of Getting Off To Sleep. I Get Letters Saying 'i Have Read Your Book Seventeen Times.' If You're An Adult Novelist And You Get That Letter, You Should Be Afraid. You're Being Stalked. Kids Always Read Them Seventeen Times!

I'd Always Liked To Write, But I Never Wanted To Be A Writer, Because It Seemed A Sissy Occupation. It Is. To This Day, I Find It Terribly Easy. And So, Rather Than Trying To Hunt Up A Text, I Just Wrote One.

Looking Back Over My Life So Far I Am Able To Remember Specific Days That Were Perfect. These Tend To Be Days, And Parts Of Days, In Which Nothing In Particular Happened, Except That I Was Utterly Happy.

The Activities Of These Parasites And Degenerates Gave Rise To Cubism, Fauvism, Futurism, Pointillism, Constructivism, Orphism, Surrealism, Dada, And Also Impossibleism, Supersurrealism, Dynamic Double-dog Realism, Ishkabibbleism, And Mama, Which Is Like Dada Only Nicer.

Trust Me, There Is No Formula For Most Things That Are Not Math.