The National Park Service Shot A Mule

The Customer Is Always Right! John Wanamaker Must Be Turning In His Grave. If You're A Customer Today, You're An Intruder.

As Anyone Who Has Ever Been Around A Cat For Any Length Of Time Well Knows, Cats Have Enormous Patience With The Limitations Of The Human Kind.

It Has Long Been A Theory Of Mine And I Am Known, If I Do Say So, For My Long Theories That Authors, Generally Speaking, Are Rotten Letter Writers.

It Suddenly Dawned On Me One Day, When I Was Reading In The Paper About A Woman Wrestler, That Being A Curmudgeon Was The Last Thing In The World That A Man Can Be That A Woman Cannot Be. Women Can Be Irritating -- After All, They Are Women -- But They Cannot Be Curmudgeons.

I Told The Good Father That If He And I Were Going In The Future To Some Wonderful Elysian Field And The Animals Were Not Going To Go Anywhere, That Was All The More Reason To Give Them A Little Better Shake In The One Life They Did Have.