The First Year I Had Money, I

When You Act Obnoxious Towards People, Like On A Movie Set, They Say "we're Ready For You" And I Say "oh, Go To Hell, My Feet Hurt And My Head Aches." You Want To Have A Margarita For Lunch, And People Like These Little Ads And Production Assistants Are Like, "well, He's Drinking Again."

Half Of The People In This Room Are More Dressed Up Than On Any Other Day In The Year, And The Other Half Are More Dressed Down.

Different Vodkas Have Different Effects. Some Make You Feel A Little... Poly-lingual. Some Make You Feel Like You Want To Talk Back To Someone Who's Giving You A Hard Time. Some Make You Feel Like Lifting Kettle Bells.

I Realize It's Impossible To Have Any Sympathy, I Mean, True Sympathy, For People That Are Famous.

My Back Hurts. My Legs Ache. I'm Only Four!