That's Not To Say That I'm A

There Are A Lot Of Good Looking Men On This Planet. It Seems Like Once A Week Someone Will Tell Me, "i Know Someone Who Looks Like You" And I Don't Know What Say To Them Except, "tell Them Hi."

My Wife Told Me That In The Bible, Abraham Circumcised Himself... Wow! I Can't Even Get To The Bank Before It Closes.

I'm A Guy Who Comes From A Small Town In The Midwest. It's Not In My Nature To Say The Most Explicit Things In Public.

You Wanna Know How Good Bacon Is? To Improve Other Food, They Wrap It In Bacon.

I Like Bowling. It's Just One Of Those Things Where I Can Do So Many Jokes About It Because I Do Know Bowling. Somebody Once Said, "the Whitest Things In The World Are Jim Gaffigan And Bowling."