Switzerland Is A Place Where They Don't

I Couldn't Be Happier That President Bush Has Stood Up For Having Served In The National Guard, Because I Can Finally Put An End To All Those Who Questioned My Motives For Enlisting In The Army Reserve At The Height Of The Vietnam War.

I Couldn't Walk Up To A Woman At A Bar And Say Hello.

I'm Really Only Happy When I'm On Stage. I Just Feed Off The Energy Of The Audience. That's What I'm All About - People And Laughter.

I Was Planning On My Future As A Homeless Person. I Had A Really Good Spot Picked Out.

Golf And Dating Don't Mix.