Some Days, I'd Feel Better With Punxsutawney

In Texas, We Do Not Hold High Expectations For The [governor's] Office; It's Mostly Been Occupied By Crooks, Dorks And The Comatose.

It's Like, Duh. Just When You Thought There Wasn't A Dime's Worth Of Difference Between The Two Parties, The Republicans Go And Prove You're Wrong.

On The Whole, I Prefer Not To Be Lectured On Patriotism By Those Who Keep Offshore Maildrops In Order To Avoid Paying Their Taxes.

Naturally, When It Comes To Voting, We In Texas Are Accustomed To Discerning That Fine Hair’s-breadth Worth Of Difference That Makes One Hopeless Dipstick Slightly Less Awful Than The Other. But It Does Raise The Question: Why Bother?

Havin' Fun While Freedom Fightin' Must Be One Of Those Lunatic Texas Traits We Get From The Water - Which Is Known To Have Lithium In It - Because It Goes All The Way Back To Sam Houston, Surely The Most Lovable, The Most Human, And The Funniest Of All The Great Men This Country Has Ever Produced.