Since I've Made It To 87 So

At Home We Ate Fish Every Friday, As Catholics Were Then Supposed To Do. Being Jewish, I Compromised. I Wore A Hat When I Ate Fish, Out Of Respect For My Own Religion And The Fish's Family.

With The Collapse Of Vaudeville New Talent Has No Place To Stink.

None Of Us Kids Had A Middle Name. We Were Lucky We Had Any Name At All. By The Time My Mother Got Around To Naming One, There Was Another On The Way.

If You Stay In The Business Long Enough And Get To Be Old Enough, You Get To Be New Again.

I Don't Worry About Getting Old. I'm Old Already. Only Young People Worry About Getting Old. When I Was 65, I Had Cupid's Eczema. I Don't Believe In Dying. It's Been Done. I'm Working On A New Exit. Besides, I Can't Die Now - I'm Booked.