Shut Up Jas, You Are Not Baby

I Couldn't Believe It. It Was Unbelievable, That's Why. My Face Was Like A Frozen Fish Finger. All Rigid And Pale. (but Obviously Not With Breadcrumbs On It.)

And That's When It Fell Off In My Hand

Here Is My Recipe For A Mood Enhancer. Take A Friend, Preferably One With A Really Annoying Fringe And Outsize Pants, And When She Is Rambling On Swiftly, Push Her Into A Ditch And Run Away.

Or If I Truly Gave Up I Could Be Like Wet Lindsay. When Robbie Dumped Her She Got All Pale And Even Wetter Than Normal. She Was Like An Anoraksick. (a Person Who Is Both Very Thin And Wears Tragic Anoraks.) I Just Made That Up As A Joke. Even Though I Am Very Upset I Can Still Think Of A Joke.

When Girls Walk Home We Put On Lippy And Makeup. We Chat. Sometimes We Pretend To Be Hunchbacks. But That Is It. Perfectly Normal Behavior.