She Sleeps Alone At Last.

If You Are One Of The Hewers Of Wood And Drawers Of Small Weekly Paychecks, Your Letters Will Have To Contain Some Few Items Of News Or They Will Be Accounted Dry Stuff.... But If You Happen To Be Of A Literary Turn Of Mind, Or Are, In Any Way, Likely To Become Famous, You May Settle Down To An Afternoon Of Letter-writing On Nothing More Sprightly In The Way Of News Than The Shifting Of The Wind From South To South-east.

I Can Get Dressed Earlier In The Evening With Every Intention Of Going To A Dance At Midnight, But Somehow After The Theatre The Thing To Do Seems To Be Either To Go To Bed Or Sit Around Somewhere. It Doesn't Seem Possible That Somewhere People Can Be Expecting You At An Hour Like That.

Every Boy Should Have Two Things: A Dog And A Mother Who Lets Him Have One

There Seems To Be No Lengths To Which Humorless People Will Not Go To Analyze Humor. It Seems To Worry Them.

When We Think Back To Our Forefathers, With Their Sedentary Lives Of Forest-chopping, Railroad-building, Fortune-founding, Their Fox-hunting And Indian Taming, Their Prancing About In The Mazurka And The Polka, With Their Coattails Flying And Their Bustles Bouncing, To Say Nothing Of Their All-day Sessions With The Port And Straight Bourbon,... We Must Realize That We Are A Nation, Not Of Neurasthenics, But Of Sissies And Slow-motion Sports.