Religion Cruelly Exploits Our Need To Feel

Ever Wonder About Those People Who Spend $2 Apiece On Those Little Bottles Of Evian Water? Try Spelling Evian Backward.

When You're Born You Get A Ticket To The Freak Show. When You're Born In America, You Get A Front Row Seat.

I Have As Much Authority As The Pope, I Just Don't Have As Many People Who Believe It.

One Great Thing About Getting Old Is That You Can Get Out Of All Sorts Of Social Obligations Just By Saying You're Too Tired.

Everything Beeps Now.