Pere Noel. Babbo Natale. Pelznickel. Topo Gigio

I Like Pixie Sticks. Yeah, Screw The Middle Man. Just A Tube Of Sugar... I'd Pour Two Of Those In A Big 12 Ounce Coke. And I'd Go Out To Catechism Class And Try To Concentrate On The Priest. I Saw Jesus Several Times. I Swear I Did.

I May Go Back And Spice It Up With A Little Bit Of The Tool Stuff And Grunting And All That That I Know So Well. But It Feels Like I'm Rehashing Old Material. And Some Of My Audiences Like That. So I'm There To Entertain. I'm Not There To Make A Political Statement Or Anything Like That. I'm There To Entertain.

Electricity Can Be Dangerous. My Nephew Tried To Stick A Penny Into A Plug. Whoever Said A Penny Doesn't Go Far Didn't See Him Shoot Across That Floor. I Told Him He Was Grounded.

Being Wealthy When No One Else Is, Is Like Being The Only One At The Party With A Drink.

Men Often Do Things For Women That They Don't Want To Do, So That Women Will Do Things For Men That They Don't Want To Do.