People Say We Need Royalty. We Have

In A Recent Interview, Howard Dean Admitted That He Used To Drink And Smoke Pot. So, Now All He Needs To Put Him Over The Top Is A Sex Scandal.

Do You Remember The Good Ol' Days When Congress Was Only Unsafe If You Were An Intern.

Everyday Is A Compromise.

Once You're President, You Can't Go Anywhere Without Causing Trouble. President Obama Shows Up In China, He's Chewing Gum, They Go Crazy. A Big Stink Because The President's Chewing Gum. And You Think, The Chinese Are So Easygoing About Human Rights. What's The Problem?

I Have Nothing Against The North Koreans But This Kim Jong Un Has Got A Screw Loose. A Member Of His Cabinet, His Security Minister, Nods Off, Falls Sleep. We've All Done It. Kim Jong Un Takes The Guy Out And Has Him Executed, Just For Just Falling Asleep. Oh, And He Was Also Deflating Footballs.