One Rough Patch Is Not The Big

I'm A Comedian, And I Definitely See The Humor In A Lot Of Things. I Am Also Sad A Lot. I Cry Often And Easily. I Think You're Supposed To Feel All Kinds Of Things. You're Supposed To Laugh, You're Supposed To Cry, You're Not Supposed To Shove Your Feelings Under The Rug.

Trying To Get The Talk Show, Looking Back On It, We Had To Beg A Lot Of Station Managers To Pick Up The Show Because People Thought No One Would Watch It Because I'm Openly Gay.

I Gotta Work Out. I Keep Saying It All The Time. I Keep Saying I Gotta Start Working Out. Its Been About Two Months Since I've Worked Out. And I Just Don't Have The Time. Which Uh..is Odd. Because I Have The Time To Go Out To Dinner. And Uh..and Watch Tv. And Get A Bone Density Test. And Uh.. Try To Figure Out What My Phone Number Spells In Words.

Human Beings Only Use Ten Percent Of Their Brains. Ten Percent! Can You Imagine How Much We Could Accomplish If We Used The Other Sixty Percent?

My Name Is Ellen And I'm A Vegetarian. Just To Add Another Label To Me: I Am A Lesbian, Aquarian And Vegetarian. I've Said It.