Oh, Am I Wearing An Ascot? I

What's Cool About Twitter Is That You Can Make A Joke About Something Very Of-the-moment Or Random That I Wouldn't Be Able To Joke About In Stand-up.

You Can't Say Your Favorite Kind Of Cake Is Birthday Cake, That's Like Saying Your Favorite Kind Of Cereal Is Breakfast Cereal.

The Hardest Part About Rollerblading Is Telling Your Parents You're Gay.

Everyone Just Did What Their Parents Did. So That Immediately Made Me Skeptical Of The Whole Religion Thing, Even As A Kid. So I Never Was Really Into Religion As A Concept.

Every Time I've Done Comedy In, Like, Traditional Comedy Clubs, There's Always These Comedians That Do Really Well With Audiences But That The Other Comedians Hate Because They're Just, You Know, Doing Kind Of Cheap Stuff Like Dancing Around Or Doing, Like, Very Kind Of Base Sex Humor A Lot, And Stuff Like That.