Of All The Ways People Save Time,

My Dad Was A Complicated Man. He Was A Huge Racist, My Dad, But He Still Tried To Be A Good Father, You Know? Like, He Would Tell Me That Santa Claus Was Black - That Way, When I Found Out He Didn't Exist, It Wouldn't Be That Big A Let Down.

In Comedy, I Hate That Cop-out Where You Say, "just Kidding." I Know You're Just Kidding. Don't Insult My Intelligence By Spelling It Out For Me That Much.

I've Got A Kid In Africa That I Feed, That I Clothe, That I School, That I Inoculate For 75 Cents A Day. Which Is Practically Nothing Compared To What It Cost To Send Him There.

When I Was Seven, I Broke My Leg Playing Soccer. Just To Feel Something.

Katey Sagal, You Are An Incredible Actress. You Worked On ‘married With Children,’ The Show That Changed Comedy, ‘sons Of Anarchy,’ The Show That Took Comedy To A Whole New Level And ‘8 Simple Rules,’ The Show That Killed John Ritter.