Now I Don't Know Why He's Denying

You Can't Swallow And Think About Your Tongue. If You Think About Your Tongue, You've Got A Giant Piece Of Meat In Your Mouth And That's A Terrible Feeling.

Facts Matter Not At All. Perception Is Everything. It's Certainty. People Love The President Because He's Certain Of His Choices As A Leader, Even If The Facts That Back Him Up Don't Seem To Exist. It's The Fact That He's Certain That Is Very Appealing To A Certain Section Of The Country. I Really Feel A Dichotomy In The American Populace. What Is Important? What You Want To Be True, Or What Is True?

As A Rule, Germans Shouldn't Do Comedy. Their Last Box Office Comedy Was Nosferatu.

First, [in High School], I Smoked A Lot Of Pot...and That's How I Got To Know The People 'half In' The Society Of My High School And We Waved At Each Other Over The Bong. Then I Got To Know People By Making Jokes.

Forgot To Live-tweet The Election Last Night, So I'm Post-tweeting Today. I'll Start As Soon As My Fingers Unclench From Their Rage Fists.