Not All Shabby Is Chic, Just Like

Unless You Are A Professional, You Will Find The Tart To Be A High-maintenance, Unforgiving Whistle-blower Of A Pastry.

Suburbia Is Too Close To The Country To Have Anything Real To Do And Too Close To The City To Admit You Have Nothing Real To Do.

We All Deserve To Be Congratulated, But Sadly That Would Mean There's No One Left To Do The Congratulating.

Some Of The Writers I Admire Who Seem Very, Very Funny And Very Emotional To Me Can Develop A Closeness With The Reader Without Giving Too Much Of Themselves Away. Lorrie Moore Comes To Mind, As Does David Sedaris. When They Write, The Reader Thinks That They're Being Trusted As A Friend.

I Called My Mother Immediately To Inform Her That She Was A Bad Parent. "i Can't Believe You Let Us Watch This. We Ate Dinner In Front Of This." "everyone Watched Twin Peaks," Was Her Response. "so, If Everyone Jumped Off The Brooklyn Bridge, Would You Do It, Too?" "don't Be Silly," She Laughed, "of Course I Would, Honey. There'd Be No One Left On The Planet. It Would Be A Very Lonely Place.