Never Perform For Your Family. They Either

President James Garfield Could Write In Latin With One Hand While Writing In Greek With The Other. I Would Give My Right Arm To Be Ambidextrous.

The Good News Is, President Obama Was Born In America. The Bad News Is, So Was Donald Trump.

President Bush Is Now Focusing On Jobs. I Think The One Job He's Focusing Most On Is His Own. The White House Is Now Backtracking From Its Prediction That 2.6 Million New Jobs Will Be Created In The U.s. This Year. They Say They Were Off By Roughly 2.6 Million Jobs.

The White House Is Now Urging Americans Not To 'read Too Much' Into Last Week's Jobs Report. In Fact, They Said It Would Be Best If You Didn't Read It At All.

You Know What Arnold Schwarzenegger And Meg Whitman Have In Common? They Both Got In Trouble For Stiffing The Maid.