When You're High, It's Easy To Kid

How Can He Be Perfect? Everything He Ever Makes...dies.

How Come When It's Us, It's An Abortion, And When It's A Chicken, It's An Omelette? Are We So Much Better Than Chickens All Of A Sudden? When Did This Happen; That We Passed Chickens In Goodness? Name Six Ways We're Better Than Chickens. See, Nobody Can Do It! You Know Why? 'cause Chickens Are Decent People.

If Black Boxes Survive Air Crashes - Why Don't They Make The Whole Plane Out Of That Stuff?

Baseball Is The Only Major Sport That Appears Backwards In A Mirror.

People Always Tell Me "have A Nice Day." Well What If I Don't Want To? What If I Want To Have A Crappy Day?