My Wife Is A Saint. She's Gandhi.

My Mom Just Told Me It's Impossible To Know What's Going To Happen In Life. Except With Breakfast, Cause She Eats The Same Thing Every Day.

The Other Day My Twelve-year-old Says To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You Right Now. You're In The Car With Me, You're Checking Your E-mail, You're Not Listening To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You. And I Say, You Know What? That Was Your Mother's Gripe, Too. And She Was Right. And You're Also Correct. When You Cop To Something, You Get To The Next Level. In This Case, The Next Level Is: I Just Learned Something From My Twelve-year-old.

My Favorite Dylan Song? I Think It's 'just Like A Woman.' It Always Makes Me Cry.

I Don't Censor Myself, But I Don't Want To Force My Sick-skewed Version Of The World, Either.

Around Comics, I've Always Been Known For, Oh, That's Not Dirty, This Is Dirty.