My God, Look At The Words People

Ernie Banks Was A Great Great Player And When He No Longer Could Play, He Became A Great Ambassador For The Game. He Represented The Game With The Highest Of Class And Dignity. Everybody Loved Ernie Banks. He Enjoyed Baseball, Life And People. Our Thoughts And Prayers Go Out To His Family. We Have Truly Lost A Baseball Giant.

The Gym Teacher's Name Was Mr. Caruso. Mr. Caruso Did Not Speak English. He Spoke 'gym.' One Day I Was Playing Basketball And Mr. Caruso Told Me I Would Have To Get An Athletic Supporter. He Didn't Express Himself Exactly That Way, Though. He Said, 'hey, You, One Day You're Gonna Go Up For A Rebound And The Family Jewels Aren't Gonna Go With Ya.' I Had No Idea What He Was Talking About. Next Day I Showed Up For Practice Without My Watch And My Mezuzah. He Said, 'did Ya Take Care Of The Family Jewels?' I Said, 'i Left 'em In My Locker.' Took Us A Half Hour To Revive Mr. Caruso.

There Are Three Types Of Baseball Players: Those Who Make It Happen, Those Who Watch It Happen And Those Who Wonder What Happens.

A Second-guesser Is One Who Doesn't Know Anything About The First Guess, And He's One Who Needs 2 Guesses To Get One Right.

He (darryl Strawberry) Is Not A Dog; A Dog Is Loyal And Runs After Balls.