My Goals Are So High That I

I Want To Be Funny, But It Has To Be A Believable Funny.

My Brother Tried To Explain Sex To Me When I Was 7 - And He Did It With A Cup.

Winners Are The Ones Who Want The Most Out Of Their Opportunities.

There Was One Incident At A Movie Theater Where My Girl Got Mad At These Guys Who Were Talking Behind Us. I Never Looked Back There, But She Was Like, 'will You All Just Shut Up!' And I Just Got Up And Moved Three Rows In Front. She Was Like, 'what Are You Doing?!' I Was Like, 'you Better Get Up Here! I Don't Play The Fighting Games.'

I Promise You, I Will Have Something On The Internet That Is Game-changing. I Can't Lose.