Mail Your Packages Early So The Post

Do You Know My Dream? I Really Want To Become An Aluminum-siding Salesman.

It's The Lack Of This Kind Of Open And Honest Education About Sex That Causes So Many Kids To Grow Up With Sexual Hang-ups.

Whatever You Do, You're Going To Be Criticized.

Egyptian President Sadat Had A Belly Dancer Entertain President Nixon At A State Dinner. Mr. Nixon Was Really Impressed. He Hadn't Seen Contortions Like That Since Rose Mary Woods.

I'm Often Asked, "what Is Your Favorite Moment During The 30 Years You Hosted [the Tonight Show]?" I Really Don't Have Just One. The Times I Enjoyed The Most Were The Spontaneous, Unplanned Segments That Just Happened, Like Ed Ames' Infamous "tomahawk Toss" That Produced One Of The Longest Laughs In Television History. When These Lucky Moments Happen, You Just Go With Them And Enjoy The Experience And High Of The Moment.