Lickspittle, N. A Useful Functionary, Not Infrequently

Zeus /n./ The Chief Of Grecian Gods, Adored By The Romans As Jupiter And By The Modern Americans As God, Gold, Mob And Dog.

Income Is The Natural And Rational Gauge And Measure Of Respectability.

Cerberus, N. The Watch-dog Of Hades, Whose Duty It Was To Guard The Entrance - Against Whom Or What Does Not Clearly Appear; Everybody, Sooner Or Later, Had To Go There, And Nobody Wanted To Carry Off The Entrance.

Magnetism, N. Something Acting Upon A Magnet. The Two Definitions Immediately Foregoing Are Condensed From The Works Of One Thousand Eminent Scientists, Who Have Illuminated The Subject With A Great White Light, To The Inexpressible Advancement Of Human Knowledge.

Clock, N. A Machine Of Great Moral Value To Man, Allaying His Concern For The Future By Reminding Him What A Lot Of Time Remains To Him.