Let's Stop For A Moment To Admire

Do You Remember When You Found Out There Was No Santa Claus? I Was So Upset I Didn't Think I'd Be Able To Do The Show.

Today Mitt Romney Is 68 Years Old. It's Kind Of Sad, A 68-year-old Guy With No Job, No Future - Wait A Minute, That's Me.

Jeb Bush Has To Distance Himself From What They Call The Bush Brand. So He Keeps Saying, 'i Am My Own Man.' But When Governor Chris Christie Is Out On The Campaign Trail, He's Always Saying, 'i'm My Own Man, Plus Another Guy.'

Donald Trump Is Talking About Running For President. He Hasn't Made An Announcement, But I Want To Tell You Something. The Fake Suspense Is Killing Me.

The Post Office Is Raising The Price Of Stamps Again. I Heard That And Said To Myself, 'if Only There Was An Inexpensive Electronic Way Of Communicating.'