Jews Are Living In The Past And

They Call It Football, But The Object Of The Game Is To Bash The Other Guy So Hard That He's Eventually Carried Off The Field On A Stretcher. I Can't Watch Football Anymore. My Psychiatrist Said It's Better That Way. I Used To Watch A Game, See The Players In A Huddle - And Think They Were Talking About Me.

The Last Thing We Need Is Another Clinton To Be Our President. Believe Me, One Lowlife Was Enough. We Don't Need The Lowlife's Partner.

My Father Was A Very Successful Businessman, But He Was Ruined In The Stock Market Crash. A Big Stockbroker Jumped Out The Window And Fell On His Pushcart.

You Know How Many Stunning Women Told Me They Can't Stand A Good-looking Man? ... Women Feel Secure With An Ugly Guy Because A Man In Bad Shape Isn't Gonna Cheat.

There Are More Democratic Schmucks Than There Are Republican Ones.