J, N. A Consonant In English, But

An Auctioneer Is A Man Who Proclaims With A Hammer That He Has Picked A Pocket With His Tongue.

As A Means Of Dispensing Formulated Ignorance Our Boasted Public School System Is Not Without Merit; It Spreads Out Education Sufficiently Thin To Give Everyone Enough To Make Him A More Competent Fool Than He Would Have Been Without It.

Battle, N., A Method Of Untying With The Teeth A Political Knot That Would Not Yield To The Tongue.

Lickspittle, N. A Useful Functionary, Not Infrequently Found Editing A Newspaper . . . The Lickspittle Is Only The Blackmailer Under Another Aspect, Although The Latter Is Frequently Found As An Independent Species.

Applause, N. The Echo Of A Platitude.