I've Never Had The Experience Of Being

Life Is So Absurd Now That It Is Almost Impossible To Be A Satirist In This Era.

You Don't Have To Lay An Egg To Know If It Tastes Good.

My Favorite Animal Is Steak.

How Do You Know If Your Child Is A Writer? Your Obstetrician Holds His Stethoscope To Your Abdomen And Only Hears Excuses.

Most Writers Write Too Much. I Have The Exact Opposite Problem. I Feel I Could Write Almost Anything In A Paragraph. I Have A Natural Ability To Condense, And So I Often Think, "are You Kidding Me? Five Thousand Words? How Am I Gonna Make 5,000 Words Out Of That?"