I've Been On Some Fairways That Are

I Give The Ball Some Sweet Talk. I Tell It That This Isn't Going To Hurt A Bit. I'm A Friend And All I'm Going To Do Is Give It A Nice Little Ride.

Over The Years I've Studied The Habits Of Golfers. I Know What To Look For. Watch Their Eyes. Fear Shows Up When There Is An Enlargement Of The Pupils. Big Pupils Lead To Big Scores.

The Fact That Slammin' Sammy Couldn't Win The Open Made It All The More Valuable For The Players That Did Win. Gave It A Special Quality. I'd Say A Part Of The Sheen On That Trophy Comes From My Sweat.

That Little White Ball Is Always Staring Back At You, Daring You To Make A Mistake.

The Only Thing I Fear On A Golf Course Is Lightning...and Ben Hogan.