It's Hard To Tell These Days What

In These Tough Economic Times, Everybody Has To Cut Back. I Am Down To Three Tabs Of Ecstasy A Day.

The Only People I Owe An Apology To Are My Dead Parents. Except My Father Because He's Still Alive.

There Are Two Kinds Of People I Don't Trust: People Who Don't Drink And People Who Collect Stickers.

Boy George Has Been Charged With Falsely Imprisoning A Man Who'd Gone To His Apartment To Pose For Photographs. Going To Boy George's House To Get Your Picture Taken Is Like Going To David Copperfield's Island For A Radio Opportunity.

Don't Take 'no' For An Answer. Keep Knocking Down Walls Until Someone Says 'yes.'