It's Cool To Go To A Place

I Did End Up Doing Substitute Teaching, But There's Not A Lot Of Teaching Involved In That.

If You See Me At A Restaurant, Blow Me A Kiss, Wave, Blow Me Another Kiss, Then Walk Five Steps Backward.

The Problem With A Lot Of Comedy Clubs Is Not That They Are A Comedy Club; It's Just The Cheesy Way They're Presenting Themselves. That's Why A Lot Of People Have A Problem With Them. If You're A Relatively Unknown Comedian, You Can Play At A Comedy Club, You Might Play To Hundreds Of People Every Night. But If You Try To Make A Concert Event Out Of It, And Try To Play A Rock Club Or Something, Where You Might Play To 10 People Or No People. And The Flipside Of That Is, That's Also A Great Thing, To Play To People Who Are Your Fans. Some People Are Too Hard On The Comedy Clubs.

I Do Not Like Sports, Unless You Consider Treating All Humankind With Love And Respect A Sport.

I Think People Have This "it Can't Hurt To Ask" Mentality, Which Is True On Some Level. I Get Comics Like, "hey, Will You Look At These Videos Of Me On Myspace?" I Was Like, "well, Who's Gonna Benefit From That? What If I Don't Like You?" No, I'm Gonna Write To A Stranger And Say, "hi. You Like Me, And I Don't Like You. And Now I Feel Bad When I Didn't Need To Feel Bad, Because You Put Me On The Spot." Or Like, "can I Open For You?" Well, I've Never Seen You Work, So No. I Certainly Made Awkward Mistakes When I Was Starting Out, And They're Just Trying To Have A Career.