It's Cold Out. It's Even Cold In

Over In Iraq After You Vote They Paint Your Finger Purple So You Can't Vote Again. It's A Flawless System. It Works Perfectly Unless, Of Course, Someone Has Paint Remover.

The Irs Said Today Anyone With A Refund Coming From Their 2001 Taxes Will Lose It If They Don't Pick It Up By April 15th. If It Is More Then Three Years They Will Just Keep It. How Come It Doesn't Work That Way With Back Taxes?

They Had A Profile Of John Kerry On The News And They Said His First Wife Was Worth Around $300 Million And His Second Wife, His Current Wife, Is Worth Around $700 Million. So When John Kerry Says He's Going After The Wealthy In This Country, He's Not Just Talking. He's Doing It!

How Many Watched The President's Speech Last Night? [half-hearted Audience Applause] How Many Watched American Idol ? [thundering Applause] Okay, There You Go! You Get The Government You Deserve.

It Was Reported In The Paper That President Bush Received A 'warm Reception' From The Daytona 500 Drivers. Well Sure, The Drivers Had Never Met Anyone Who Was Sponsored By More Oil Companies Than They Were.