It's Best To Give Advice In Only

Yes, We Praise Women Over 40 For A Multitude Of Reasons. Unfortunately, It's Not Reciprocal. For Every Stunning, Smart, Well-coiffed, Hot Woman Over 40, There Is A Bald, Paunchy Relic In Yellow Pants Making A Fool Of Himself With Some 22-year Old Waitress. Ladies, I Apologize. For All Those Men Who Say, "why Buy The Cow When You Can Get The Milk For Free?", Here's An Update For You. Nowadays 80% Of Women Are Against Marriage. Why? Because Women Realize It's Not Worth Buying An Entire Pig Just To Get A Little Sausage!

We're All Torn Between The Desire For Privacy And The Fear Of Loneliness.

I Never Understood Retirement. What Is The Attraction Of Retirement? I Go Down There To Florida And Look Around And I Said, My God, Who Wants This? Not Me.

It's Ridiculous For A Country To Get All Worked Up About A Game—except The Super Bowl, Of Course. Now That's Important.

Everyone Hates War, Everyone Says.