It Is Really Funny How Even Cool

It'll Be Taught In Homes That It's Not Okay To Make Fun Of A Kid Because He's Gay Or It's Not Okay To Make Fun Of A Girl Cause She's Fat. But That We Have Been Living For So Long In A Culture Where So Many People's Parents Supported Those Beliefs That There Wasn't Any Infrastructure For Children Understanding Right And Wrong In Those Situations, If That Makes Sense.

The Only Time I Felt Like A Weird Exploiter - Even Though I Knew I Wasn't One - Was When I Was Writing A Sex Scene Between Me And My Adorable Co-star [adam Driver] In Which He Had To Tell Me How Much He Loved My Potbelly. It Seemed Like A Weird Wish-fulfillment Thing, Where I'm Directing My Own Fantasy.

I Should Do The Things That Make Me Feel Cool And Smart. As I Get Older, I'm Realizing More And More That It Doesn't Really Matter If I'm Good At It, It Just Matters That I Try. My Own Effort, My Own Willingness, Are Becoming What's Appealing To Me.

I Remember It Made Me Feel Better Because So Many Of My Friends At School. Were Doing That Stuff And Doing That Stuff On Sleep Overs. But I Just Didn't Feel Ready. It Wasn't Like I Had Any Judgment Of It Being Two Women. It Would Have Scared Me As Much If Not More. I Was Like A Three Month Period In Which All The Words Sleep Over Was Code For Was "let's Get Together And Touch Each Other's Vaginas." And I Was. Haunted. And I Remember Going Home And Feeling Like I Couldn't Tell My Mother Even Though She Would've Understood And Probably Laughed.

My Mom Knows Pretty Well How I See Her.